13 netiquette principles to empower your child

What comes to mind when you hear the word "netiquette"? Britannica says, “The purpose of netiquette is to help construct and maintain a pleasant, comfortable, and efficient environment for online communication, as well as to avoid placing strain on the system and generating conflict among users.” In short, the unwritten rules of online conduct are about fostering positive interactions that reflect the values we uphold offline. 

Just as in the offline world, when we are online, we are part of society – we are digital citizens, and it is our responsibility to behave respectfully and safely. What should your children know to master the art of netiquette?

1. Be kind: Encourage your child to treat others online as they would in person. Words can leave a lasting impact, especially when written and evidenced. A little kindness goes a long way. Before hitting "send," your children should ask themselves: "Would I say this to anyone face-to-face?" You should emphasise that online interactions have real-world consequences: hate speech or hurtful comments can tarnish one’s reputation and affect future relationships or employment possibilities. On the other hand, words of support and care can work miracles for someone struggling, even if they are only said online. 
2. Think before you share: What we post online has a lasting digital footprint, and even when we share something with just a few friends, it is always possible that our posts will reach other people. So, we must discuss with our children how to share responsibly. Teach your child to differentiate between what's appropriate to share and what's best kept private. This applies to photos and videos as well as text messages. Maybe you can give your child an example from your own experience, for instance, of a time when you posted something and then regretted doing so. This way, the topic will become less theoretical.
3. Always verify: Encourage the habit of critical thinking. Advise your child to double-check information  before sharing or reposting it. Sharing hoaxes may damage your child’s present reputation as well as that of their future: it may even limit employment options. Misinformation spreads like wildfire, and being a responsible digital citizen means verifying facts and promoting accuracy. 
4. Question online identities: Help your child understand that not everyone on the internet is who they claim to be. A 40-year-old man can easily pretend to be an 11-year-old girl. Encourage scepticism, empower children to value their privacy, and only talk to people they genuinely trust .
5. Give others space: Teach your child not to overwhelm people with messages and comments  and to give their friends the space they need to speak their minds. Online communication is a two-way street that thrives on mutual respect and consideration.
6. Ask for consent before sharing: Instil the value of seeking permission before sharing photos or information about others. Respecting others' privacy demonstrates empathy and consideration for their feelings. Before posting pictures or discussing someone else's life online, your child should ensure they have the consent to do so. 
7. Respect the privacy of others: Imagine your child logs on to a school computer, only to find that a friend who had previously used the computer hadn’t logged off their social media. What should they do? Rather than using this situation to tease their friend, your child should log their pal off and encourage them to be more careful in the future. Just as your child should not use their friends' social media without asking, they should not take others’ devices or go through others’ apps.
8. Don’t forget about your surroundings: Being immersed in the possibilities of the online world can sometimes lead to us forgetting about reality offline. Remind your children to be considerate of their surroundings before playing music, watching a show or making a loud video/phone call in public.
9. Communicate mindfully: Mastering online communication ensures that your child's messages are respectful and well-received. Together with your children, explore the basics of good online communication – from being concise to choosing the right tone for different platforms. Did you know that:
   • it is polite to start each conversation by directly addressing the person you are talking to.
   • grammatical mistakes may make you seem less respectable in the eyes of others, so you should always check your messages before sending them.
   • when you send a message with diacritics, the receiver may be unable to read it.
   • that EXCESSIVE CAPITALIZATION may come across as shouting.
   • you should sign your first email with your full name so the recipient can easily identify you.
10. Know your power: Discuss the responsibility that comes with online influence – even in small circles. Teach your child to consider the impact of their words and actions on their community and encourage them to use this influence positively to inspire others through thoughtful and uplifting content.
11. Choose a neutral nickname: Guide your child in selecting a username that neither reveals their identity nor invites embarrassment later. An original nickname can protect their online presence while allowing them to express themselves creatively.
12. Embrace the offline moments: While the online world can be captivating, remind your child to unplug and pay attention to face-to-face conversations. Looking at your phone when someone tries to talk to you is not very polite. Teach your children to value the present moment and be attentive to those around them. You can do so through various activities or simply by being a good role model for them. 
13. Be thoughtful when commenting: How do you comment according to the rules of netiquette? There are many aspects to consider. Read more about them in our article. 

Good netiquette manners as superpowers

As you embark on the journey of teaching netiquette to your child, remember that the principles of kindness, respect and responsibility transcend the online world. By nurturing these values in your child's online interactions, you're not just shaping their digital presence – you're helping them become compassionate and mindful individuals who can thrive in any environment. Download the netiquette poster and give it to your child to remind them of basic netiquette principles.

DOWNLOAD

Take a short quiz with your child to see how well you both know the rules of netiquette!

QUIZ

Ready to test your netiquette? Answer the questions in our quiz (note: correct answers are bold and more than one answer might be correct). 

• Imagine you have taken a beautiful picture of yourself and your friend. You want to post it, but your friend does not like how they look in the photo. What should you do?
  • A) Post it anyway –you both look good, which is all that matters.
  • B) Post it, but change the settings so that your friend won’t be able to see the post.
  • C) Don’t post it and assure the friend that you think the picture is nice, but you respect their decision.
• You receive a friend request from someone you don't know. What should you do?
  • A) Accept the request right away. It's always good to have more friends.
  • B) Check their profile and mutual friends; only accept if you feel comfortable and believe they are genuine. If you’re unsure, you can always ask your parents for advice.
  • C) Ignore the request and pretend you didn't see it.
• You want to comment on a post, but someone has already written the same thing you would say. What should you do?
  • A) Like their comment to show your agreement.
  • B) Copy their comment and post it as your own.
  • C) Don't comment at all – someone else already said it.
  • D) Think of something unique that adds to the conversation and post that.
• You're emailing your teacher about a school project. What's the best way to write the email? 
  • A) Use all capital letters to make your points stand out.
  • B) Keep it brief and to the point.
  • C) Use appropriate language and greetings.
  • D) Fill the email with emojis to show your enthusiasm.
  • E) Sign at the end with your name.
• You're hanging out with your friends at the park, and one of them is telling a story. Your phone buzzes with a non-important notification. What should you do? 
  • A) Politely interrupt your friend and check your phone.
  • B) Ignore your friend and start texting back right away.
  • C) Finish listening to your friend's story before checking your phone.
• You're in a group chat, and someone shares a mean comment about another person in the chat. What's the best course of action? 
  • A) Speak up against the mean comment.
  • B) Encourage others to be kind.
  • C) Laugh along with the comment to fit in.
  • D) Share your own mean comment to show that you’re a part of the conversation.

To help your child learn more about online relationships and how to build positive relationships, visit this module by Digital Matters.